Before You Date, Investigate!
I remember when I uncovered the deceptive ways of an Ex. I didn’t go looking for it but rather, it was laid out in front of me like a neon sign. He had apparently gotten sloppy in covering his tracks and that’s how it all unfolded.
Since then, I’ve been receptive to the fact that every person I meet has the possibility for allowing me to ONLY see their best. I’m no exception. We want to get that guy or get that girl to fall in love with us but in reality, when you’re finally behind closed doors, Love sometimes isn’t all roses and rainbows and it can trap and blind you from the truth. Love is that commitment to the person that you love, seeing them at their WORST and still wanting to be with them.
What if you knew the WORST before you fell in love? Would you give them a chance? Would you run for the hills?
Joe Schmo might seem like the All American Hottie. He may be tall, dark, built and charming in a way that makes Jane Whats-Her-Face fall head over heels in love. But if she inquired public records and saw that he spent time in prison for grand larceny, tax evasion, any sexual offense, or manslaughter, would she give him a chance?
Since the unveiling of a shady character in my past, I tread cautiously into the future. (Fool me once….shame on you. Fool me twice….shame on me.) I believe in self-preservation and I want to take the safest path to get there. I have googled everyone that I have ever dated. I once searched a screen name and uncovered a person chatting away in a forum for “Herpes in Cincinnati.” What told me that this was the guy was that he included his name and his phone number. Either that’s some cruel joke from his buddies or he was really looking for those like him.
True or not, it’s alarming enough to even think about him scheduling to meet someone when he’s not having an outbreak. If you don’t take the curious road like I do, hopefully someone would tell you before you swap spit or take it even further…..
I asked a number of guys “Have you ever googled someone before you went out on a date with them?” Out of the responses I have gotten, 34 said NO and 8 said Yes. I received some interesting feedback. Some guys seemed to laugh as if it was an absurd question. Others decided it would be a good idea and they would from now on. Thank you for your honesty.
Take heed, not because you’re looking for the bad in people, not because you want to call them out on it, but because you have enough sense to protect your safety. Traffic tickets aren’t anything to get all worked up over, but there are a lot offenses that can put you in a tough situation. If you have a past yourself, maybe choosing someone with recent drug charges isn’t going to help you break your cocaine habit, or someone that is constantly going to court for collections, may not help get your credit back on track. It’s up to you what you want to do with the information you find, but don’t wait because it may be too late.
Before you swap spit with the herpes infested saliva, let the sex offender move in, or give your credit card to the tax evader, do your research.
Before you date, INVESTIGATE!